I am 36 today, which is a number divisible by many other numbers. While the birthdays that fall on decades (ie turning 30, 40, etc) still stand out for me as important markers, birthdays that are very divisible serve to offer more subtle comparisons and reflections. Here are some of some of the ones that I am thinking about this year.
2 & 18-18 years ago, I moved out of my parents home. I hope that this year, I will be bringing children to my home. Although technically I was an adult when I was 18, I think that I finally feel like an adult this year.
4-I am only 4 years away from 40…currently I am 9/10ths of the way there! I have really been “getting” that life begins at 40. Envisioning my life in 4 years is so exciting, every year of the last few years has gotten easier and better. I have never imagined being in such a stable and supported lifestyle nor have I had the grounding to really envision parenting and how it will manifest in my life and home.
6-Since I am 6 squared this year, this seems like a good number to look at. I am also 6 years past 30. When I turned 30, I immediately felt a sense of relief. I remember realizing that I didn’t have to have everything under my control and every answer to every question. Not scrambling around for every answer has actually been self-centering, in a way. The last 6 years have been a process of learning to really prioritize and focus. I have found more of a balance between taking opportunities as life presents them (Is this a slippery slope between letting life steam-roll over me? I mean, especially in the Bay Area, there are soo many opportunities!) and being proactive to creating my own opportunities.
9-In numerology, 9 represents completion. Lately, I have found myself very focused on keeping loose ends tied up; making lists and clearing them. I have had some projects in the works for some time and they are getting done! There is a way that I am having feelings of completion in a greater-life sense, I will be a mother soon and it is not that I feel incomplete without kids, but now that we have decided to get kids, there will necessarily be a hole until we do.
12-In chinese astrology, animals go through a 12 year cycle. Because I was born in the year of the rat and we are now in a rat year, this represents a strong year for me and calls for leadership and progress. This year will set the tone for the next 12. I do feel hopeful that there may be momentous changes this year, although I don’t see many options to work toward that. I have been seeking a role in change for many years now and have finally found a focus (at least, for now) on creating a family and offering children opportunities that they may not have otherwise.
